These are our green spring days here in Central Texas, with electric green oak pollen falling on everything, and bluebonnet patches exploding at roadside, and rain lilies constellating the lawns. Actual rain has fallen, and more on the way, and I am feasting my eyes on all this deep soft green because the scorching summer is scratching at our doors already.
These days I am nesting feverishly. This weekend found me sitting on the kitchen floor, scrubbing those forgotten, always-overlooked corners, culling and organizing my grocery and reusable bag stash, prettying up my fridge with washi tape and art and making it work hard with a spot for meal plans, and a sheet with handwritten oft-used dressing recipes. Spaces feel fresh and inviting and I am always on the lookout for the next spot on which to unleash my scrutiny and zeal.
These days I am waking to the comforting rituals of a hot washcloth to the face, dabbing on some rosewater, neti, hot water & lemon with honey to soothe my allergic throat, then poetry, before, finally, on to coffee and writing of morning pages. I have been delighting in waking before the little bear, drinking in the stillness and quiet, except when I've been awake in the night, and sleep in until he joins me in bed for cuddles and "jump awesome", like this morning.
These days my thoughts are full of double strollers and baby massage oils and anything else I can imagine to lull me into feeling like I can handle this gig with two kids.
These days I am watching my sister-in-law, who welcomed a baby girl into our family last week, make that very transition herself, with bated breath, hope and fear all mixed in.
These days I am listening obsessively to this and this and this and more again of this.
These days I am rekindling my relationship to the yoga mat, remembering my own strength, beauty, openness and equanimity in the process.
These days I am reading voraciously: this, then this, which I abandoned to read this.
These days vacillate between ease and softness and the hardest of hard, but I am practicing coming back to my breath, retreating, starting over, self-forgiveness, and feel I am growing strong and supple in all these skills.
These days you would find almost all my meals in the intersecting planes of a Venn diagram of greens, poached eggs, and avocado.
These days I am writing to-do lists with items like breathe deeply, move slowly, listen to the rain.
These days I am playing with washi tape, scissors and glue in a Smashbook, harking back to my adolescent days of magazine cutting and pasting, and uncovering new truths in the process.
These days I am looking for the light.
These days I am feeling wild ripples in my belly, from this strong swimmer of a son who is growing, growing, growing. These days I am amazed at one body, one heart's capacity to expand so.
These days I am wishing you the soft green of new life, cool breezes into fresh spaces, depth of ease and finding beauty in your own truth.