Monday, January 13

revelation




The simplest things can be a revelation. The way we keep on relearning the same old familiar lessons, and are struck by their freshness again each time. How good it feels to be outside and how good a poached egg tastes. Answering that ancient ache in the bones by lacing up the running shoes again and pounding pavement with your feet. How it feels awesome and awful and awesome over and over again. The strange alchemy by which we get more energy by spending energy. Feeling clear about what I most want, I am focusing on a few simple things this year: being outside more, writing, saying yes to what needs to be done in the moment. It's extraordinary the freedom that clarity brings, and how, knowing what you truly want, how you most dearly want to move in the world, creates space for your life to settle itself around what really matters. So now we are going outside everyday, me and the boys. I strap Cash in the Ergo and Silas grabs his diggers and off we go. It's a dumb, simple thing but for so long it was so hard. Everything was so hard. But knowing what I truly want makes it easy. We say hello to the goats and to the horsie that live next door. Silas scoops and dumps and I play with iPhoneography and dance to Lorde in the middle of my yard and feel truly happy. It helps that the weather is gorgeous, January in Texas being more like April or May back in Canada, where I'm from. This new year feels truly new. It's exciting. But the newness comes not from introducing new things or goals or practices but from choosing to hone in on the old stuff, the stuff that used to make me most happy before I became a mother, before I lost my way a bit, caring for myself caring for the boys. It's a bit like returning home, to who I was with the poetry and the running shoes and the Annie Dillard books and all of the tea and writing. The yoga and the breathing. Elemental happiness. The truest beauty of making love, and the tenderness after. Returning to the deepest nourishment I know and finding the happiness that blooms from that place. The revelation is in the roots. Go there.



Joining Amanda and friends playing with Write Alm's January Prompt-A-Day.

6 comments:

  1. This is an absolutely beautiful post. Thank you so much for sharing. I've been a little lost learning how to mother two little girls. But you have reminded me to just go back to what makes me me, writing, reading, tea, knitting. By finding myself again is how I will mother these two. They need ME and that is enough.

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  2. I adore this post, Fanny. Welcome home! It's the loveliest place to be, afterall.

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  3. oh I do so love this post~ and I look forward to reading through your blog a bit, it looks lovely.

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  4. This is beautiful and the simplest things are the most difficult to remember, I find.

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  5. Blessings to you on the "restart" this year... I hear you, loud and clear!

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